


You are loved, more than you know

by YouKeepMeRight



Series: Merthur a kiss a day challenge [14]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, M/M, Merlin runs a sex blog, Mutual Pining, One Shot, seriously it was supposed to be porny but it turned out super fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:22:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26893633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YouKeepMeRight/pseuds/YouKeepMeRight
Summary: “Ouch! You know, you are incorrigible!” Merlin answered, shaking his head. He had been too drunk to argue with Gwaine, so together they set up a whole blog to give people sex and relationship advice, giggling like teenagers.Day 16: one person pouting, only to have it removed by a kiss from the other person
Relationships: Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: Merthur a kiss a day challenge [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1831621
Comments: 16
Kudos: 117





	You are loved, more than you know

It was a warm September day in London, and St. James Park was packed with people. Everyone was glad to have some more time to enjoy the open air. One person among the crowd, however, was happy for an entirely different reason.

Merlin was grinning like an idiot, laying down on a beach chair. He felt so smug, his hands behind his head like he was relaxing in front of the sea.

“Have you won the National Lottery, dear?” Mrs. Alice asked. She had run the ice cream corner for years with her husband, Gaius. They had known Merlin since he was a little boy. Merlin’s mother worked as a maid for some members of the royal family, and she used to leave Merlin with the old married couple when nannies weren’t available. Merlin thought of them as his grandparents.

“I wish, Alice. No, I am just happy for no particular reason,” Merlin answered, still smiling.

“Actually, I happen to know there is a very solid reason. Possibly, a _blond_ reason.” She said with a playful smile and a wink, handing Merlin his favorite ice cream.

Merlin blushed. Damned the day he introduced Arthur to them! But Alice was right; the blond was the reason for his happiness.

Everything had started many years before, during his second year of university.

“Come on, you are so good at this! Do it!” Gwaine had begged him one night while they were having a drink at their usual pub. “You have helped me so many times with women. Remember that trick with the fingers you taught me? It worked wonderfully last night.” Gwaine told him with a satisfied smirk. “Everyone should be lucky enough to have your counseling. I mean, think about how much less frustration there’s going to be when everybody is getting laid well.” Gwaine punched Merlin’s arm playfully.

Merlin had always been fascinated by human interactions, allowing him to be an expert at giving advice, even if his own experience in the sex area was, well, nonexistent.

“Ouch! You know, you are incorrigible!” Merlin answered, shaking his head. He had been too drunk to argue with Gwaine, so together they set up a whole blog to give people sex and relationship advice, giggling like teenagers. 

The first article Merlin posted was titled: “How to survive the horny teenage years of your life.” Merlin finished editing it at midnight, posted it, and closed his laptop with a tired, but satisfied yawn.

The next morning, he checked his blog while eating his breakfast of porridge and noticed he had received a mindblowing 9,137 views, 2,365 comments, and 102 chat requests. 

“Shit buggering fuck!” Merlin shouted, throwing away his spoon.

From that moment on, Merlin overheard every person in his neighborhood and his school talking about his blog at least once a day. However, Merlin never mentioned his name on the site and continued to play the part of the fool when people asked him opinions about this new, amazing blog. Merlin had begun running a sex advice blog as a joke, but now, it was his biggest secret.

It was lucky Merlin had always been good at keeping secrets.

>=<

Secrets like his crush on Arthur Pendragon. To be honest, Merlin had been head over heels for him since primary school. On their first meeting, Arthur had helped him fight an imaginary dragon Merlin had imagined out of the branches of an enormous tree above the school’s garden. All the other children laughed at him, because Merlin had created a sword from a piece of cardboard, but it wasn’t rigid and was bent at a strange angle.

“That doesn’t even look like a blade, it’s more like a mushy, octopus tentacle,” a child named Cenred mocked. Everybody laughed, but Arthur didn’t. He went up to Merlin and picked up a wooden stick.

“Here, let me help you,” Arthur told him, walking beside him and standing in what he assumed was a fighting position. Merlin smiled at him from under the edge of his hoodie.

From that moment on, Merlin and Arthur spent a lot of time together. They ate lunch at the same table, played the same games, and they imagined the same adventures. However, as they grew up, their interests changed.

Arthur was more the sporty kind of guy. He was now a leader on the university football team, and his spare time was almost entirely dedicated to training. On the other hand, Merlin was more the academic type. He was very fond of books and liked to observe people’s behaviors. Despite all this, they stayed on friendly terms with each other.

Even though they attended the same schools, and now, the same university, Merlin and Arthur had grown up differently. Nonetheless, that didn’t stop Merlin from growing his own one-sided feelings. Sometimes, he found himself watching Arthur from distance, preferring to observe his friend’s habitual behavior rather than approach him.

“I’ve just had one boyfriend my whole life, Gwaine, how can I keep on this travesty!” Merlin told his friend one day when he felt crushed by a wave of low self-esteem. They were supposed to be doing research for an essay but ended up spending the afternoon working on the blog in Merlin’s apartment.

“In addition, I’ve fancied the same person from...I don’t know, it feels like _ages_! I don’t even know what it means to want someone who isn’t bloody Arthur!” Merlin complained.

“How long has it been since you last checked those chats?” Gwaine asked, ignoring Merlin, his friend's laptop balanced across his legs. “Mmm, there seems to be a guy who keeps writing to you. Oh wow, he shows affection for you, too!”

“What? Let me see,” Merlin said, and he yanked his computer out of Gwaine’s hands.

**Dear blogger** , user DragonHeart had written, **I am indebted to your words. You have helped me so much in situations I couldn’t figure out by myself. I couldn’t even ask my friends, because how can I come out to blokes I share the showers with every day? However, I am forever grateful. Sincerely yours.**

Another message from a week after that: **dear blogger, I miss a dear old friend. I don’t know how to tell him, hell, I don’t even know if he wants me back in his life! Please tell me what I can do. Ps: gosh, I love your last entry!**

There was another, more recent message: **dear blogger, I understand that you must be flooded with messages, but I beg you, I am desperate. I need my friend back! I keep looking at him from a distance, I feel like a pining girl from some Victorian novel, for goodness sake!**

Merlin checked who was the sender of those messages and his heart fluttered. He had helped Arthur to create that email address. Merlin couldn’t believe what he had just read. He had always thought he was the one who yearned for Arthur the whole time!

“Gwaine, could you please leave me alone?” Merlin asked with a tremulous voice.

“Really? Things are moving so quickly already? Okay, nobody can say I am a cockblocker,” Gwaine said while leaving the room in a rush. Merlin threw a cushion after him.

“I need to be sure,” Merlin told himself. So he began to type:

**Dear DragonHeart, when you talk about an old friend, what do you mean? Is he someone from your childhood? What kind of feelings make you want to have him back?**

Arthur began to type immediately after Merlin pressed send. It seemed he was very impatient to have an answer.

**Game, set, match!** Arthur answered **You guessed it right. He is indeed someone from my childhood and, well, my feelings for him are simple: I want to fuck him.**

Merlin would never admit it, especially to Gwaine, but he actually needed some time alone after that revelation.

>=<

The next day, Merlin gathered up his courage and went to watch the university football team train. Arthur, being the team captain, was going to be there. Merlin intended to speak alone with him once the rest of the team was gone. But he wanted to enjoy the sight first.

Merlin had never been on the bleachers of his University football stadium. There were too many noisy and annoying girls who had come to ogle the players and the seats were very uncomfortable. However, none of those things mattered today, for Arthur was astonishingly beautiful. The blond man was running across the muddy field in white shorts and a deep red t-shirt. His hair was damp with sweat, and since he had fallen many times down on the slippery grass, his clothes were soaking wet and covered with mud, leaving very little to Merlin’s, or anyone else’s, imagination.

Merlin’s gaze was so fixed on the gorgeous, sex-on-legs right in front of him, that he didn’t hear the person approaching him until he was sitting right beside him.

“Hello, freak. Enjoying the view, aren’t you?” Cenred laughed scornfully and sat even closer to him. Merlin tried to move away, but there was a wall on his right and that bastard on his left, trapping Merlin in that awkward situation.

“You know, I’ve been here many times since I am studying those guys’ pathetic techniques, but I’ve never imagined I could have the pleasure of seeing you here, too,” Cenred hissed, placing his hand on Merlin’s knee in a repulsive attempt to flirt. Merlin felt a wave of nausea crash over him.

“Well, you are not doing a magnificent job since your team has lost every single match with our guys,” Merlin said, trying to sound confident.

“Mmm, that was before, though. Now I know how I can distract the annoying Pendragon captain.” Cenred began to slide his hand from Merlin’s knee up to his thigh. Merlin wanted nothing but to break every single bone in that bastard’s hand.

“Stop it right now or...” Merlin began to say, ready to use every single drop of energy to fight Cenred.

“Or what?” Cenred mocked him. “I thought you liked this. Didn’t you write an article about how to seduce a guy?” Cenred whispered, leaning closer to Merlin.

“I...I didn’t...”

“Oh, don’t deny it, Emrys, I know it is you who runs that silly blog. My father runs a powerful computer programming agency, remember? It was so easy to hack your stupid website.” Cenred laughed.

His sarcastic and triumphant laughter drew Arthur’s attention. He ran off the field, stopping right in front of the bleachers where the two of them sat.

“Is everything alright?” Arthur asked breathlessly.

“Oh yes, cap, more than alright. In fact, could I speak to you in private?” Cenred stood up abruptly.

Merlin sat petrified in his seat. He was unable to speak, even when Arthur turned towards him one last time while he and Cenred walked away. The whole situation went from amazing to catastrophic in a heartbeat. Merlin wished to never face any living creature ever again.

>=<

Three days passed and Merlin still hadn’t left his room. He had emailed his professors to take at least a week of time off for personal reasons, and he lingered in his bed all the time. He even got a fever, he felt completely sick. He could barely eat, and every time he thought about what Cenred might have said to Arthur, he felt like he was going to vomit. Gwaine had called him a couple of times, but his friend could do nothing but listen to Merlin’s pathetic excuses.

On Wednesday morning, Merlin’s doorbell rang, waking him up from the stupor he had fallen into.

“If you are boy scouts again, please leave before I open the door or the smell of your bloody biscuits will make me vomit...” Merlin opened the door to find a dashing Arthur standing right in front of him, with flowers in his right hand, and _oh my God_ was that a hint of a beard? Merlin’s thoughts were spinning.

“...again.” Merlin finished his sentence before leaning weakly against his door frame.

“Whoa, whoa, it’s true that you are sick, then!” Arthur exclaimed while trying to help Merlin get back inside his house. “Here, let me help you.” 

“How can you be like this after...” Merlin began to say, but he leaned against Arthur’s side, anyway.

“Hush now. Let me take care of you, we can talk later, okay?” Arthur tugged Merlin gently towards the sofa and helped him to lie down. Merlin still felt uneasy, but somehow Arthur’s presence was a soothing balm for his restless soul. Merlin closed his eyes and fell into a dreamless sleep for the first time in days.

After an hour, Merlin jolted awake. He tried to sit up, his head hurt badly. 

“Don’t do that or you are going to feel sick again,” Arthur rushed beside him and placed a hand on his arm. “Now lay down gently, I need to check if your fever has dropped.” Arthur put a hand on his forehead and Merlin felt himself blush.

“Well, at least now you are warm and flushed for an entirely different reason,” Arthur smiled reassuringly, but Merlin was still nervous.

“If you are here to argue or to tell me you hate me, please don’t do that. I want to remember you with this smile. I don’t want the last image of you in my mind to be your angry face, please, Arthur,” Merlin was babbling, trying to grasp every bit of Arthur’s arms he could reach.

Arthur frowned. “Merlin, could you please stay still for a minute? What the hell are you talking about? How can I even think about hating you?”

“You...you don’t hate me?” Merlin asked in a little voice, pouty lips and puffy eyes.

“Of course I don’t, you adorable turnip head!” Arthur said affectionately while sliding down his hand towards Merlin’s cheek.

“How can I ever hate someone I adore so much?” Arthur whispered, leaning in to brush his lips against Merlin’s chapped ones.

>=<

Merlin was dreaming, it was the only plausible explanation. He felt like he was drowning in Arthur’s blue eyes. They were lost in each other’s gaze until eventually, Arthur spoke.

“When Cenred told me everything, I felt sad at first, because I wished it was you to tell me the truth, not that creepy brute,” Arthur whispered, nuzzling Merlin’s cheek tenderly. “But after I punched him in the face for mocking you, I felt relieved. I wanted so badly for it to be you that runs the blog!”

Merlin smiled, his eyes flashing from Arthur’s lips to his eyes. “What gave me away?”

Arthur’s face lit up. “Well, for instance, your way of using silly words in your articles. I don’t think anybody else in the world knows what a dollophead is.”

“If I were to describe what a dollophead is in two words, I would say Arthur Pendragon!” Merlin exclaimed triumphantly, slipping away from Arthur’s embrace with reinvigorated energy.

“You little...Come here you!” Arthur chased Merlin all around the apartment.

They ended up on the carpet in the middle of Merlin’s living room. Somehow, Merlin landed with Arthur beneath him, pinning his friend’s wrists to the floor over his head.

“Now who’s little,” Merlin murmured, placing his forehead against Arthur’s.

Arthur’s eyes darkened. “You know this isn’t just a lust-driven moment, don’t you?”

“Uh?” Merlin was already feeling drunk with desire.

“I mean, I want to take you to bed, but that doesn’t mean I seek just that,” Arthur spoke while leaving feather-like kisses all over Merlin’s face. “I want the whole package. I want to hold your hand while we walk home from university, I want to play with your ridiculous hair while I hear you talk about ancient books you keep reading in the library. I want everything with you.”

Merlin let go of Arthur’s wrists and framed his face between his hands. Merlin leaned down and kissed him with all the passion he had kept buried all those years.

“Then, by all means, take me to bed Arthur Pendragon.”

Long minutes passed, but in the end, they got up from the carpet to head towards Merlin’s bedroom.

“You know, I felt particularly inspired by that article you wrote about how to get two orgasms in a short time. Could I volunteer to try your thesis?” Arthur asked, grinning.

“Oh God, you’ll be the death of me!” Merlin groaned before closing the door.

**Author's Note:**

> Blame the Hoegarden for this! I am the only person who can turn a sexy prompt into a ball of tooth rooting fluff...  
> As usual, a big shoutout to my beta, my rock, my patient friend mother-of-lions!


End file.
